Island nutter is utterly Abs-urd

Yo Mon, listen up, know what I'm saying like..say a proper hi to da cool gangsta guy Abs. All da way from da mean streets of kingston........upon Thames.
If there is a more absurd white boy on the face of the planet I'd like to meet him. What kind of an airhead bases his whole life on Ali G? an Abs kind of Airhead.

but all of a sudden the rapping tosser from the legendary cool boyband 5ive is the latest "star" of ITV's horrifically unpopular un-love-d island. He's an industrial scale dickhead who needs to be urgently taken aside and told. "your real name is Richard and you are not BLACK" Abs won't save the Fjian fiasco from it's slow painful death. Nor did the really ugly seen better days tawdry twins they briefly parachuted in as the south seas disaster plumbed new depths

Source: Sunday Mirror